Resurection from depression… a poem

HELLO

Here am I

All alone

A sea of people everywhere

My eyes cast down upon the stones

A path I always bear

 

No one ever sees me

No one calls my name

Days go by with silent tears

Always just the same

 

Happiness is not a friend

Too special that for me

My time here on the treadmill’s end

Suffer, suffer, suffering

 

My tears well and go unseen

By all the passersby

Harder each and every day

In bed, each night I cry

 

Why has this life forbidden me

To find all a soul can seek

Alone am I in this great big world

Blinded eyes don’t see

My hearts dried up and dead

The sun arises every morning

For me it’s always filled with dread

Solitude, lifeless, boring

 

Out there on the sidewalk

Amid the silhouettes I grieve

Inward crashing oceans writhe

To crush and drown and seethe

 

Have I come to the stopping point

A wall of truth be known

Time ticks on its faithful path

My way is lost and gone

 

The shuddering breaks through from their depths

A chasm I never knew

Screaming inward tearing loose

The threads that kept me glued

 

Stuck in place to suffer more

And more and more and more

Abhorrent demons leave the lair

Attack me until I’m torn

 

To capture and to hold in place

While I in my abandonment

Head down again to lose the race

My broken heart is sediment

 

Here now comes a searing light

Squinted yet my closed eyes see

Beheld within a valid sight

Transfixed in wonder

Blood rushing through me

 

A feeling I’ve never known

Looking into the eyes of love

Broken is my heart of stone

As I stand there gazing

I feel the pain

 

Like nothing I’ve felt before

Looking for my reflection to see

In broken mirrors on the floor

Who is the stranger there in the glass

 

Unfamiliar the look on that face

As the muscles in my jaws hurt strangely

There is a smile of sovereign grace

White light blinding

 

I feel the presence

That I once knew as a child

Hindered no longer by the awkward soldier

Who filled my cup with vile

 

Emptied now and thrown away

Never to be held again

My hands are free

My eyes can see

The love buried deep within

 

Morning breaks in all its glory

Clean and fresh a brand-new start

I cannot seem to wipe this smile

That springs up from my heart

 

God has reached out His hand

And touched this mortal being

People see me for the very first time

And they smile too in seeing

 

Never have I told my name

Not ever reached out before

Hindered by the fright within

Closed that solid door

 

No longer journey I alone

A new path lay before me

Open eyes see all there is

In a world that used to ignore me

 

Consciously I extend my hand

To a stranger passing by

Resurrection upon my reflection

They smile without knowing why

 

Hello, my name is…

Illusion of darkness… a poem

DISSIPATION

As the leeward hillside darkens

A canvas of lightless entrapment broadens its grip

Weary be to those who trespass upon this entrenchment

As too they will become prey to their own folly

Heather sways gently in a Siren’s song of the night calling

Bewitched in austere wonder

Fall not to the dancing chorus blades of green

Spell-cast the intruder calls to collect his coin

A vintage rare is what he seeks

Is this the finale of a life lived in overt delusion

Stars look upon the scene without blinking

Struck by the awkward beauty in transfixed hypnosis

Whoa be the wicked found here tonight

Rivers of sadness will surely spill their banks

Rivulets seek solace

Yet here there is none to be found

Earthly creatures burrow deeper to avoid the conflict

Reverberations reach down as if to call and torment

Fog billows in as a blanket of concealment

Never meant for the living eye

The task at hand is won

He snares his quarry

And, with a faceless smirk he retreats with the prize

Heartbreak? Nah… a song

DAY AFTER DAY

What is it that makes you cry at night

When you lay down your head

Why do you have that tear-soaked pillow

Lonely, in your bed

 

And who was the guy that broke your heart

Your center you need to find

A new beginning a brand new start

It can all be yours when you are mine

 

Don’t cry yourself to sleep tonight

Let me take that pain away

I can show you how to live a life

And be happy day to day

You can wake up to a sunshine smile

And kissed by the morning dew

It’s the life you live not the style

I can make your dreams come true

Day after day

 

Life can be cruel with its dips and ruts

Running down an unpaved road

But I’ll be there to pick you up

When you stumble I’ll bear your load

 

 

So take my hand and run with me

Through the fields of lily white

Never to give up again

It’s time you got it right

Day after day….

 

Don’t cry yourself to sleep tonight

Let me take that pain away

I can show you how to live a life

And be happy day to day

You can wake up to a sunshine smile

And kissed by the morning dew

It’s the life you live not the style

I can make your dreams come true

Day after day

Yeah, yeah, yeah

Day after day

Oooo-oooo-oooo-oooo

Day after day

 

Only one way into Heaven…

I AM

 

Don’t be afraid

For it is I

I am the way

I am the truth

I am the life

Come follow me

Oh, fishers of men

Truly I tell you only through the Son

Can you get in

 

The last will be first

The first will be last

Innocence only found in the child

To heaven is cast

And if you believe

Carry me always in your heart

For this short time upon earth’s not forever

While we are apart

 

Don’t be afraid

For it is I

I am the way

I am the truth

I am the life

Come follow me

Oh, fishers of men

Truly I tell you only through the Son

Can you get in

 

Riches are not what will save you

It’s only my love

Respect always your neighbor

As taught from above

Do the right thing

And always care from the heart

For one day I and all of my angels

To you a new start

 

Don’t be afraid

For it is I

I am the way

I am the truth

I am the life

Come follow me

Oh, fishers of men

Truly I tell you only through the Son

Can you get in

Truly I tell you only through the Son

Can you get in

A soldier and new father… a song

AN EYE IN THE NIGHT

I’ve longed to hold you

Close to me….

And look into your eyes

With glee….

I long to kiss and hug you tight

And tuck you into bed at night

 

But I’m here stuck away from you

It’s something that I have to do

And make sure you’re always safe from harm

With patches on my shirt sleeve’s arm

 

I keep an eye out in the night

So all of you can sleep real tight

It’s what we do when we’re away

A soldier for the USA

 

And yes it is a sacrifice

For you we will lay down our lives

We’ll never turn and shy away

We fight this war yes, everyday

 

But one day soon I will meet you

I know I’ll shed a tear or two

And looking at your little hands

Gives promise to this simple man

 

My uniform means freedom rings

For all the summers and the springs

That you are safe from outward harm

That’s why these stripes are on my arm

 

I keep an eye out in the night

So all of you can sleep real tight

It’s what we do when we’re away

A soldier for the USA

 

Yeah, we’ll keep fighting for what we know is right

So this world can sleep safe tonight

And truth be told I miss you bad

But soon you’ll meet me….

I’m your dad

 

I keep an eye out in the night

So all of you can sleep real tight

It’s what we do when we’re away

A soldier for the USA

It’s what we do when we’re away

A soldier for the USA

Times of war… our hero’s stand up

THE CENTURION

Kindred the fallen

Threadbare and frayed

Broken in pieces so small

Soil is foreign

Your sacrifice given

The fight is for us one and all

Brave and relentless

The toils of battle

Prayers lifted more everyday

Hardened the portrait

Of those left behind

Whoa is the price that you pay

Cinders arising

Upon a beat ground

Hollowed the lost souls forgotten

Terrible pain

Is the stain of this war

Lying there in the trenches so trodden

Fleeting the thought

Family behind you

Lest you lose your direction

Your angels awaiting

Patient and safe

Challenging this missed affection

Never to waiver

Amid the explosions

Dodging, unbroken you bend

You’re cut is the brave

The solemn vow taken

Our Centurion protects to the end

A song of great loss…

FINAL DANCE

As I sit here in this hospital room

Thinking back over the years

Trying my best to fill the time

Between the sobbing and the tears

 

Looking up I see you smile

Dreaming in your sleep

Never a worry in the world

God will take your soul to keep

 

And I pray…..I pray….

Dropping down upon my knees

Knowing your time isn’t long

Begging the good Lord please

I would so gladly take your place

Lord give this soul a chance

And I pray….I pray….

Have we danced our final dance

 

Something in the touch of your hand

Causes these blurry eyes to look up

Seeing you looking down at me

Your love’s filled up my cup

 

And there’s a message in your eyes

As the look begins to fade

But not before there’s one more smile

Given me on this final day

 

And I pray…..I pray….

Dropping down upon my knees

Knowing your time isn’t long

Begging the good Lord please

I would so gladly take your place

Lord give this soul a chance

And I pray….I pray….

Have we danced our final dance

 

The nurse comes in upon the singing

Of that heart machine

As I kneel holding onto you

My ring upon your ring

 

And I pray…..I pray….

Down upon my knees

Knowing your time has finally come

Begging the good Lord please

I would have gladly taken your place

If He had given me a chance

And I pray….I pray….

We’ve danced our final dance

And I pray….I pray….

We have danced our final dance…..